Breathing The SSDD Mantra

chronicling the raves and rants of a narcissistic, angst-ridden bastard in orgiastic moans recluse as he drifts to the SSDD mantra... life can be boring, especially if you're bland to begin with. the world is round and it can make you a fool if you let it. stab the snooze. make a mark. crawl out of your TV celluloid and live a wicked life. because life's a bitch and you have to be a bitchier fuck-me-Freddy to live. viva la vida!

Home » Post Item » Year of the (Rant) Rat Wrap-up

Year of the (Rant) Rat Wrap-up

December 29, 2008

This is a post of relentlessly emo proportions. If you don’t want to cringe and vomit the shitty by-product of some two-decade old young man’s SSDD idiosyncrasy, I ask you to close this tab and go fornicate with some gum-chewing slut of HIV origin whose boobs are sagging down to her waist and whose orifice might very well accommodate the entire male population of Taiwan continue your browsing of some cheap Maria Osawa porn. Or you could do yourself a favor and find something sensible to do, perchance guillotining yourself and ridding the world of at least one pathetic moron. That’s one less ignoramus out of close to 6.7 billion suckers.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

For all its worth and for whatever petty temporal elation it has brought you, commercialized Christmas is finally over. And along with its fuckin’ passing comes the inevitable turning of a new leaf for all of us, or at least for the non-Chinese folks following the Gregorian calendar. I’ve been feeling an empty void these past few days that I could not bother to correspond to all the people wishing me and my family happy holidays, much less blog a sensible post that any Internet passerby looking for some arousing “hoinky toinky” discreetly at one Trojan-packed R18 site might stumble upon.

I have hibernated to my favorite recluse, you see. Devoid of petty stereotypes and fucked up social norms, I retreated to the comforting pages of my books. I shunned the bitchy vent outs of reality TV’s ugly villains who make my life much miserable than what it already is and traveled to Gaiman’s frenzied London Below, experienced timeless romanticism in Garcia-Marquez’s words, shared the sentiments of Zafra’s wisecracks. At least, even just for a while, they make me forget my whinings, my failed dreams, my insatiable thirst for the uncommon, my wish for a life better than what I am wallowing at as of the moment. At least, even just for awhile, I could be in a different world devoid of petty pretensions, of hopes gone hoaxes, of bitchy life becoming a tad bitchier.

Geez! What a fuckin’ prelude. Now I am ranting again. My Scrooge Christmas tells it all. That’s how I feel right now. I better not elaborate. Maybe because I’m in my early twenties and I think of myself as a failure. I have not made any significance yet. My life is contained in a cardboard box and I am letting it be. Or is it really?

A year will almost have gone by and here I am wallowing in self-deprecation. True, I am well aware this year has been marked by a lot of achievements and personal improvements and I am thankful for them. But somehow, I still feel unfulfilled, like a cup filled to the brim but only because of too much froth. Here I am, a young man well within his early twenties admired by friends and foes, by kindred and kin because for them he is one demigod celluloid borne out of comic tomes – magnanimous, mythical, excellent par none. And yet, deep down I feel there is nothing to be admired and very little to brag about.

When I was little, I told myself that by this age, I should have already fulfilled my childhood dreams, caught the stars and danced like mad under stardust sprinkles. The kind of dream that was uttered not out of sheer just-for-the-heck-of-it when asked by persistent family members but more of as a result of becoming the man that you ought to be when you grew up. The kind of dream that you don’t forget and cross out and change as you age but rather, something that you stick on because you know deep down inside this is what you want to be when you grow up.

Life was tough on me early on, you see. I had no option but to be much tougher than it. Fate threw in some vile creatures from the very pages of double douche bag reality and I could not even complain. Unlike other adolescents whose only mars include blotches of petty teenage angst and unfounded rebellion, I had to bear with fatherless childhood and proletarian upbringing and all the crappiness that a prince-gone-pauper life entails. So life’s a bitch and you have to be bitchier to live. And thus began my resolve not to succumb to the lousy, stereotypical expectations. I chose not to be a defeatist. I chose to be a perfectionist – a non-conforming, narcissistic bastard never walking the same lines all the normal, idiotic drones walk through.

I have said it before and I am telling it once again that I do not subscribe to sugar-coated miseries. I live life as I see it and I do not let petty euphemisms and sweet words wrap it. I have told myself that if I am on the verge of dying and the tube is the only thing that keeps me breathing, then I’d rather they pull the plug and get it over and done with. Spare me the theatrics. They make me cringe. Maybe I have yet to see the beauty of life, no matter how cliched that may sound. Maybe I have always willed myself to wake up on the wrong side of the bed every morning. Because I always believed that everyday, it’s always the same shit running for the nth time. Maybe because I’m 21 and I have been robbed of my childhood laughter early on. I’ve been forced to become a fucked up adult without my permission.

And this is why I whine and tell life is a bitch ’till kingdom come and hurl out sharp-stabbing invectives that only show little of what I really feel. Words will never truly commensurate to the human emotions we feel. They are just attempts to clothe what we feel and to let this human emotion shape up and make us notice it, or at least decipher a bit of it. Because what we feel is always larger than life.

I believe that all these rantings will only be ephemeral. They will not last long and someday, somehow, I will find life’s genuine meaning. For now, though, allow me to be young and restless and ranting. Allow me to digress and to wrong and to hurl out sharp-stabbing invectives. As the Year of the Rant Rat wraps up, allow me to get bruised and stand up and learn. Allow me to keep growing. In the mean time, though, allow me to rant and blog and get even with the wicked ways of the world by polluting it with my randomly semi-idiosyncratic, semi-idiotic thought bubbles.

Postscript:

This is the last post from an angst-ridden, narcissistic bastard in orgiastic moans recluse for this year. Breathing the SSDD Mantra is only young, I am aware, and in spite of its being only three months’ old, it’s nice to know there have been quite a few souls out there who have professed relating to its effing content and have put in their two cents’ worth on how diabolically fucked up this planet really is and how it would be a better place to live in if not for pathetic, stereotypical drones multiplying as rabid as guinea pig fornications. So for those folks (yes, that includes you my dear high school English teacher, you who have surprisingly stalked on this site and patted your student for a job-well-done sans the regular sprinkle of R18 profanities) who agree in ridding this macrocosm of inutile, lifeless twits, here’s to looking forward to another year of  deranged idiosyncrasies as I become one step closer to my devious plan of world domination.

Happy New Year suckers!

Lio Loco now signing off… 

Posted by ssdd at 8:00 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

happy new year sau mah dear fren…

ingat sa paputok..hehhee

wag ka magpapaputok baka ka makabuntis…

lol :P

Posted by Fred Thirst at December 31, 2008, 5:53 pm

@fred thirst! happy new year too! siraulo! anong ginagawa ng magic kapote? hahaha! :D

Posted by ssdd at January 1, 2009, 9:52 pm

Add a comment








ain't this friggin' narcissistic, angst-ridden bastard cute?

anonymous.jpg

 

A lot of people tell me I’m special. Of course I freakin’ am! You don’t have to stress the obvious. That’s being redundant.

 

I’m a friggin’ yuppie in his early twenties but looks even younger than his age, sometimes mistaken for a scrawny 17-year-old virgin and as such, I have decided to become eternally twenty to be on the safe side. I am slaving the ephemeral call center whoring job as of the moment but one day, I will become a fuckin’ proud CPA topnotcher. Being a perfectionist who does not conform to stereotypes and anything commonplace, I abhor senseless, pointless discussions by nitwits but adore intellectual discourses from remarkable geniuses in the same league with the caliber of my neurons and synapses.

 


I like wearing black shirts even if black is not a color and I love drinking Red Horse booze with pineapple syrup or GSM Blue enhanced by acerbic Sprite when the night is hugged by penis-shrinking coldness in Baguio. I am left-handed and I like to draw but that does not mean I am dumb at Math. Along with English, Math was one of my favorite subjects in high school. I love to watch anything shocking, gross and bizarre; in fact, I find scenes of decapitated heads and messy, blood-soaked innards oddly engaging. I think I'm eclectic.

 


When my half-Chinese dad chickened out, I got robbed of my childhood phase real quick and was forced to live out the family man title. That was also the time that I bade goodbye to the princely way of living in Manila and said hello to the clusterfuck pauper proletariat life in the province. Being the smartass that I am, I excelled academically and graduated half-wishing I had a worthy adversary in the mold of Einstein or da Vinci to sharpen my not-fully-developed cranial muscles. But if you ask me of my biggest achievement so far, I would have to tell you that’s when I sent my sister to schooling and saw her taking her oath as a Certified Electronics and Communications Engineer. I chose to put my dreams in the back seat for her, you see.

 


When I was still in school, I thought my seatmates were drooling retards and I was an effin’ superior child unworthy to be kept inside such a fucked up pig pen. For chrissake, I deserve something far better than those freakin’ bozos! So if I could choose who I want to share the claustrophobic classroom with, I’d pick Neil Gaiman, Stephen King, JK Rowling, Jessica Zafra, Patricia Evangelista, Conrado de Quiroz, Bob Ong and Scott Garceau hands down. They’re authors, if you’re that stupid, by the way.

 

I do not possess the vapid handsomely looks of dumb celebrity stars (they only have the looks but they don’t have that thing in between the ears, anyway) but I am not ugly either. I think I’m cute and as in my penis, my looks could be thrown up there in the above-average file. I am narcissistic and unsurprisingly, I find satisfaction in looking at myself in mirrors. There’s one flaw in my nearly perfect personality though. I am horizontally-challenged and that actually makes me less handsome than I should be. People have been telling me that had I been given a mesomorph frame, I would surely qualify as a handsome dork. Fine, I’ll hit the gym once I find the time. But then again, I’ve always been busy.

 P1170442 copy.jpg 

 

I love writing and someday, when I’ve already reached the stars and danced under stardust sprinkles, I will write the Great Filipino Novel that will put the Philippines in the world literary map. In the meantime though, I content myself with polluting the Internet bandwidth with fuck-me-Freddy rants and unlimited R18 invectives.


I am a narcissistic, angst-ridden bastard in orgiastic moans recluse and this blog is my first attempt in realizing my idiosyncratic world domination plots. There are currently almost 6.7 billion suckers lurking out there contributing nothing to society but vomit-inducing stupidity. Most of these people are worthy to be guillotined to death for harking out such idiotic yadda yadda's.

 

If you believe in this horrendous truth, then join me in ridding the macrocosm of these useless, pathetic twits. If you're the twit, though, go find someone to savor your last fornication on earth and then prepare to be annihilated. The world will be a better place to live in without you, anyway.



This is my blog. You either love me or hate me. Adding me in your blog roll list is fine but don't expect that I will publish your effin' you're-going-to-hell comment. And yes, I don't do ex-links. That's being pathetic. The blogs in my  blog roll are those that I peruse regularly and normally, I don't tell these people I've added them in the list. If you find that offending or for whatever reason, you feel it is an invasion of your privacy rights, just let me know. I'll scrap your site in the list real quick. Otherwise, consider it a form of flattery.

 

ON SECOND THOUGHT, I THINK I AM NOW WILLING TO DO EX-LINKS. ALL THESE BLOGGERS WHO WILLINGLY PERUSED THIS GOOD-FOR-NOTHING BLOG MADE ME CHANGE MY MIND. SO YES, YOU CAN NOW COMMENT USING A "NICE POST! EX-LINK?" TEMPLATE. HAPPY?

 

Caution: Breathing the SSDD Mantra is my idiosyncrasy in print. If you can't take the heat in this ranting oven, close the tab and  go screw your next-door neighbor's wife, you pathetic little twit!

 

Don't say I didn't warn you...

1_300566795l. jpg

 

douche bag diatribe unlmtd.

go friggin' plagiarize others' works instead

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 Unported License.

been harry pottered since the philosopher's and when the saga died down in deathly hallows, i got pottered just the same...sigh!

one effin' proof why pinoys are waaay more superior than their occidental brethrens in the history of friggin' humanity

shaving off the angst-ridden bastardness in me (play with my hamster using your mouse pointer)

Subscribe

Technorati
Bloglines

three-liner shits

yes, i want a piece of you! got a problem with that?

hair loss treatment:

nice website..

Pacquiao vs Mayweather:

Mayweather vs Pacquiao Fight, News and Updates

pacman:

nice blog site. ok na ok.
anyway share ko lang po. you can watch manny pacquiao video collection here:
http://boxing-tube.tk
or here:
http://mannypacquiao.tk

RJR BEAUTY INDUSTRY:

We are manufacturers and exporters of prime
Quality Surgical, Dental, Beauty care instruments & Hospital
Equipment and all sorts of Scissors.
We are producing these instruments from best quality Japanese
Stainless steel under Germany technology

M/S RJR BEAUTY INDUSTRY

60 C, Small Industrial Estate
Sialkot- 51310, Pakistan.

Tel:+ 8103467
Cell: 92-300-6179667
92-334-8071045
Fax: 92-52-3550398
Web: www.rjr-beauty.com
E-mail: info@rjr-beauty.com
rjrbeauty@hotmail.com

Moyra Parker:

Dear,s

“RJR Beauty Ind” is an established company involved in
Manufacturing and Exporting of high quality “Manicure/Pedicure,
Beauty care & Beauty Salons instruments”. We are supplying
following products worldwide Barber Scissor Edge T.C Titanium
Scissors Nail & Cuticle Scissors Nail & Cuticle Nippers Nail &
Cuticle Pushers Nail Cutters Acrylic Nail Tip Cutters
Manicure/Pedicure Kits Tweezers Kindly visit for more products
information
Thank you,

Moyra Parker
General Manager

Web: www.rjr-beauty.com
E-mail: info@rjr-beauty.com
rjrbeauty@hotmail.com

mai:

iloveyou. fuck me

mai:

hi pasukan mo nga ko.

toni:

gusto namin pmnta ng dasol (tambobong beach) meron bang place dun to stay overnight or any contact?

ssdd:

Damn, thank you for such strong flattery madam! You may want to stalk me still at thessddboy.com

cat:

You are so damn right. you’re extraordinarily talented. :)

YanaH:

oist adik!!!!!!! san ka? baket hindi ka maramdaman ng blogworld? hahahahaha

ssdd:

@vanvan & kitkat: wag mag-away…alang alang sa alaala ni master rapper kiko. mahal ko ang lahat ng bumibisita sa walang kwentang kutang ‘to. powerhugz! :D

~kitkat~:

@vanvan hehe kakompetensya din pla kita??? aw wlang dirty game ha…hahahhaha bsta ako lab ko c lio loco aalagaan ko sya…hndi ko sya kras mahal ko c lioloco lab ko yan mwah!!! honeykooch ko yan e ^_^

vanvan:

ngwaste ako ng golden time sa pagbabasa ng mga nakasulat dito..me lablayp ka na pala..wala ka man lang warning..bad lio loco loco..sabi ko na nga ba eh..i should be over you!!..aheks..pakiss nga..dami dami naman kasing ngkakras sau..kakaloka..

~kitkat~:

honeykooch mahilig k pla uminom??? wag ka masyado magiinum kc nakakalaki ng tyan tapos bka macra ung atay mo ^_^ paalala lng drink moderately kc lab kita mwah!! ayoko magkasakit ka dahil sa alak mwah!!! ingat k plagi ha mwah!

~kitkat~:

eneweis miss u mwah lab u!!! ingat k plagi ha ^_^ God Bless mmmmwwwaaahhhhhuuugggzzz!!!!

~kitkat~:

natutuliro knb saken hehehehe gsto ko yan pero mas gsto ko ung naiinlab kn saken hahahahhaha ang kapal ko noh dpa nmn tyu magkakilala personally..tsk panu nmn kita makikilala e wla nko sa makati pero ok lng kc maghahanap ako ng trabaho dyan dyan lng din sa makati hahahha bibili nko ng dyaryo bukas manila bulletin am shore madami dun hehehehhe kya bka magkasalabungan n ulet tyu sa daan un nga lng dko alam ikaw n pla un…hehhehehehe

~kitkat~:

ah e na layoff nko…ngayun ko lng nabsa ang powerhugz msg mo kya wla nko trabaho so sad..dko nga alam anu mararamdaman ko e nagaalala kc ako bka mauubos ko ung separation pay ko ng wla prin akong trabho hahahahha pero alam ko n madami akong pedeng patusin n trabaho kc mdami cla dyan hahahahahahha un lng e kung papatusin din nila ako dba ganun lng un hahhahaha

ssdd:

@~kitkat~: natutuliro naman daw ako sa’yo. di ko alam kung dito o sa taas na shoutbox ako magrereply. ahehehe. dayoff ko ngayon. kaya inuman galore. hehehe. recession na ba jan? tsk tsk. sana hindi ka naman matanggal. mahirap alang trabaho ngayon eh. eto ang powerhugs pang-goodluck charm! hehehe. powerhugz! :D

~kitkat~:

hahahahha gsto ko yan powerhugz mo yum!!! hahahahahaha kras mo pla c sara geronimo wweeee wla lng…
kmusta k nmn??? musta kn dyan sa work mo??? d2 samen e nagtatanggalan na e…tapos napanaginipan ko n nagsara na tapos ako lng daw ang hndi binayran tsk tsk tsk masakit un dba…buti nlng at panaginip lng lahat…uu nga pla mahilig kb sa computer games???

Leave a message ▼